Cross Country Swimming - in a stadium!
The swimmers all dive into a pool that is only 25 meters square. Seats, bleachers and luxury boxes rise up from the edges of the pool. A special machine at the far end of the pool creates the course out of a plastic/fiberglass looking substance, which flows back to the swimmers, along with the water. So they are kind of side-scrolling, like in old 2D video games.
The machine weaves back and forth, making turns, while still maintaining the individual lanes for the swimmers. The machine also makes some altitude changes, so the swimmers all 'high center' from time to time and have to scramble over the 'hump' before returning to their swimming stroke.
D.I.Y. Michael Stipe vocals
Guy at the hardware store info desk. Asks the woman in the vest and nametag how he can sound like Michael Stipe. She asks, "Which era? The first 5 R.E.M. albums or the Sell-Out stuff?" The guy replies, "The indie sound." She nods, comes out from behind the counter and says "This way."
They go to an aisle in the hardware store that has small diameter metal pipes and dowling. She points to a bin of aluminum pipes. "Get yourself about 12 of these, have 'em cut 'em about a foot long. Pile 'em together in a circle and put duct tape around the outside. It'll look kinda like a bee hive honeycomb.
She then crosses the aisle and points to the dowling. "Then get a dozen of these, also cut to foot lengths. They should just barely fit into the pipes. A little piece of double-sided tape at each end of the pipe should hold the wood in there securely."
The guy nods. "And this contraption will make me sound like early R.E.M.?"
The woman smiles confidently. "Yep! Sing through this and it'll render the words to any song completely unintelligible, but also make you sound earnest and heartfelt."
The guy beams. "Awesome! I'll take it!"
Photo from let-them-eat-vinyl.com